World Wide Weirdos
by Kurama no Tenchi
Summary: The usual story. Boy meets computer. Computer is taken over by freaky demon plants. Odd talking bunny appears. Boy and friends are sucked into computer. Girls laugh at boy's stupidity. Yep, nothing out of the ordinary here.
1. Caution: Author is on Sugar High

Whew. Haven't done a YYH fic in a while. Let's see how random I can get within the next five minutes.

Disclaimer: I don't own YYH.

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Chapter #1

Yusuke was having problems. Not problems of the demons-taking-over-the-world variety. Oh no.

His mom had bought him a computer. She actually expected him to use it.

But the damn thing wouldn't work right.

"It doesn't work, Kurama." Yusuke had called Kurama over for technical advice. Four minutes later Kuwabara appeared looking for his kitten. Twenty-six minutes later Hiei showed up demanding food.

"It's not my job to feed you," Yusuke had yelled. Then he punched his computer.

"That can't be very good for it," Kurama pointed out sensibly.

Hiei shrugged. "It's not my fault. That furry thing under Kuwabara's bed didn't keep me filled up."

Kuwabara paled.

"YOU ATE MY KITTEN?"

Kurama sighed, and turned back to the computer.

"I think I can get this to work. The program's just a little different than I'm used to." Kurama rolled his eyes at Yusuke's screensaver. "Interesting young lady, Yusuke."

Kuwabara momentarily forgot his kitten and looked over Kurama's shoulder. "How does she get her legs to bend like that?" He frowned. "Does Keiko know about this?"

"Shut up."

Hiei's eyes grew wide as he surveyed the oddly dressed human floating across Yusuke's screen. "Interesting."

The boys continued to fiddle with the machine, and thus failed to notice Kurama's backpack start to shake. Leafy tendrils wound their way up the table leg, and directly into the back of the monitor.

"What the heck?" Yusuke growled as the screen went blank. "That thing's brand-new! What did you do to it, Kurama?"

"Me?" Kurama tapped frantically at random buttons. "I didn't do anything!"

"It's like someone fried it with weird demon powers!" Kuwabara cried dramatically.

Everyone looked at Hiei.

"It wasn't me." He glared. "Idiots."

Yusuke fumed. "My mom spent all her drinking money on this! She's going to kill me when she finds out!" He turned a sickly green. "Or worse…she might get so depressed she'll get herself sober!"

The screen flashed brightly.

Hiei drew his sword. "What's going on with this human instrument?"

"I don't know." Kurama jumped back as the computer screen swirled over with pink and purple colors. A shape appeared.

"Hello Friends!" The shape called out. It turned itself into a bunny. "I am Sir Softy, the Cyber Sweetie. Please follow me, and the miracle of the internet shall be revealed."

"The miracle of the internet?" Kuwabara repeated doubtfully.

"Oh yes," Sir Softy said cheerfully. "Come on in."

Waving his pink bunny paw, Sir Softy summoned all his super-softy-bunny-powers, and pulled the boys into the computer with a very nifty flash of silver light.

"Ha." Softy nodded to himself happily. "Sailor Moon ain't got nothing on me."

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Sir Softy. Hmmm...this should be fun.


	2. Mutant Paperclips!

Random Person number 3, you rock! My very very first reviewer!

And yes, bunnies are a bit creepy, aren't they?

(Checks website.)

Ooooh, I got another one! It hasn't come up on the screen yet, but whoever's my second reviewer, thanks!

You rock too!

Disclaimer: I don't own YYH.

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Chapter #2

Yusuke and Kurama landed squarely in the middle of a large white room filled with junk.

Books, games, bikes, cars, pencils, socks, glasses…everything in the world floated lazily about the huge cavern of a place.

Sir Softy the Cyber Sweetie (unlike Hiei and Kuwabara) also appeared mysteriously in the room, but he used his ultra-girly-pink-hearts-and-cutesy-bunny-footies to direct his landing to a soft orange beanbag chair floating a few feet off the ground.

"Where the hell are we?" Yusuke snarled. A shoe hit him in the back of the head.

"Did you or did you not want to see the internet?" Sir Softy demanded.

"Yeah, but we didn't want to be sucked into the computer."

"I didn't suck you in," Sir Softy said with a wave of his bunny paw. "We Cyber Sweeties don't suck anything."

Yusuke's then turned his attention to Kurama, who was busy chasing a bottle of shampoo.

"One hundred yen! Two hundred! Aw heck, I'll give ya a thousand!" Kurama shouted as he raced after the bottle, feebly trying to grab it.

"WHAT DID YOU DO TO HIM?" Yusuke yelled at Sir Softy.

"He," Sir Softy snapped angrily, "is falling under the power of the website."

"What website?"

"Oh," Sir Softy cheered up considerably. "Yes, this is one of my favorite parts of the net. We're on EBay."

Yusuke scratched his head. "Oh yeah. We tried to sell Kurama here last year."

Sir Softy nodded. "He was one of the most popular items for a while. All those, uh…_passionate_ fangirls. Such a pity that that type of thing's against the law."

"We could've made a fortune," Yusuke said wistfully. He jerked himself out of this daydream. "How do I make Kurama normal? And where did Kuwabara and Hiei end up?"

"For Kurama, all you have to do is get him off this site." Sir Softy shrugged. "He looks pretty happy to me, but whatever. I have no clue where your other friends ended up. They struggled too much when I let you in. They could be anywhere as far as I know."

Yusuke stared at Sir Softy.

"What are you?"

Sir Softy sighed. "You know that little paperclip that follows you around on your computer?"

Yusuke nodded.

"That was me, before the accident."

"Accident?" Yusuke asked. "But we didn't do anything to you."

"Well, obviously someone did something to me," Sir Softy snapped. "Do I look like the happy-go-luck paperclip I once was? Oh, those were my glory days!" The diminutive bunny burst into tears. "An-and now l-l-look at m-me!"

"Wow," Yusuke said. "That really sucks."

"I already told you," Sir Softy stopped crying, "that we Cyber Sweeties don't suck. Anything." He looked sad again. "I am now a mutant paperclip."

"Do you know how that happened?"

"No, just that something outside the computer made me this...this..." Sir Softy gestured at himself. "This mutant freak! My friends and I were all horrified, of course. But we got over it really fast." Sir Softy waggled his tushie in the air. "Chicks love the cotton tails, y'know."

"So there are more of you?" Yusuke ignored the bunny's butt.

Sir Softy nodded a bit sadly, and lowered his rear end. "Yeah. I sent some of them to go searching for your friends. Which is probably what we should be doing. Okie-dokie?"

"Um…sure. Fine. I'll go get Kurama." Yusuke started towards Kurama, who was still shouting prices at random hair products. "Where are we going to start anyway?"

"Well," Sir Softy said slowly, "I think we need should start where they'd want to go."

"What?"

"It's a physiologic thing. When they came in, they subconsciously sent themselves to the places they most wanted to go. That's how I got us here." Sir Softy beamed. "But you can't really expect me to get it, I'm only a fluffy airhead!"

"You and Botan would get along great." Yusuke ran his hand through his hair. "I dunno. Where the heck would Kuwabara and Hiei most want to go?"

**over at some other website...**

Hiei very slowly opened his eyes.

_What is that foolish sound?_ he wondered, as a tinkling melody drifted through the vast space.

That's all it seemed to be. Space.

And Hiei was stuck floating in the middle of it.

Making it's way slowly toward the hovering demon, a rounded shape grinned, and propelled itself through the empty space.

"Shut off the music!" Hiei growled abruptly. The music didn't stop.

Wait a minute.

That music.

This place.

Wasn't this some human show?

"Hello, friend!" A brightly-colored animal appeared quite suddenly and wrapped itself around Hiei's middle. "Welcome to Fuzz-A-Lot, the home of the Care Bears! I am Snuggly, the Care Bear of All Things Hug-Related."

Hiei paled.

"Damn."

**in the middle of a huge electronic bakery...**

Kuwabara stuffed a chunk of cake in his mouth. Then he took a bite of candy cane. After that he shoveled in a few dozen doughnuts, two packs of gummy worms, eight Hershey bars (both light and dark chocolate), three gumdrops, some mints, a giant cookie or two, and one freaky Swiss-meat-pastry that he vowed never to touch again.

"I love the internet."


End file.
